Fred Goes Swimming(03:00)
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Transcript

Fred: Hey, it's Fred! And it's really nice out so I think I'm gonna go swimming later. My mom found this really cool pool at the dump. It's really big and really deep. I think I might drown! And also I got a letter in the mail. It might be from my dad! To: Fred. (laughs a few times and opens letter) What the heck is this? (reading letter, camera shows letter as reading) Ha ha, you probably thought this was your dad, you loser! Anyways, I told you that I know where you live. (Note actually reads, "I know you live") P.S., Your voice is weird... From: Original youtube.com/fred owner. (Fred, in slow motion, screams.)
So the crazy guy really does know where I live! What if he comes over here and steals all of the food out of our fridge? I don't want anyone to steal our food! Oh, and I wonder why he thought my voice was weird? Well, whatever. I'm gonna text Judy on my ZipIt telling her to meet me at my swimming pool. (reading as hes typing it) Hey Judy, this is Fred, please meet me at my swimming pool. See you there. Bye. (puts ZipIt down) I hope she meets me there! (cuts to high shelf in basement. Cat With Rabies is on the shelf) The cat with rabies is inside my house because I like her now. She rescued me from Kevin! (Watch How I Do This plays for a couple seconds while the cat sits there) (cuts to pool) Here's the really big pool. It's so big! If you're wondering why I'm wearing my shirt while I'm going swimming it's because I'm uncomfortable with my body. (fred suddenly has a blue dino floatie and arm floaties on) I'm ready to go inside the pool! (cuts to Fred on the side of the pool with hands forwards) 1, 2, 3. (splashes in the pool, head first) Oh my god, it's cold! (swims around in the pool) I love swimming. I love swimming! This pool is small! On TV, I saw a pool that was really big. This pool is so tiny! (punches his floatie) Give me a bigger pool, you stupid floatie, give me a bigger pool. (singing) This pool is big enough for me because I don't ask for a lot. (holds up yellow and black colored shark) Oh my god, there's a shark. (Screaming and splashing around. After a moment it shows him splashing in slow motion) I'm scared. Just kidding, it's just a toy shark. I got you! Oh my god! I just peed inside the pool! my mom is gonna be so mad because she said I'm not supposed to pee inside it! Why did I do that? Oh my god you can see through my shirt. Good thing Judy didn't come over or she would've saw I peed in the pool. She would've been grossed out! (singing) La-aa.

Judy (offscreen): Oh my god, look at Fred swimming inside the pool with his shirt on...

Fred: No! I'm just uncomfortable...

Judy (offscreen): You must be hiding your man boobs, sicko!

Fred: Once again Judy is being a brat, but she's still pretty so it doesn't matter if she's nice. At least Kevin's not...

Kevin (offscreen): Let's go beat up Fred inside the pool.

Fred: Do you want me to get the cat with rabies to bite you again, fatty! Oh my god Kevin's chasing me. That little rascal. Well whatever, I guess I'm gonna go inside because everyone's being mean to me. I hate the world!!! But I don't hate the neighborhood squirrels. I love them. Well I guess I'm back inside now. I just got an IM from Kevin. (reading) Dear Fred don't ever ask Judy to go swimming with you again. She's mine. What in the world is he talking about? For your information Judy said she's currently single. Whatever!! Oh and by the way I'm really mad at Kevin because he bought a Zipit after me and when I got my Zipit they were really expensive and now they're really cheap! Why did I have to spend more money than Kevin? Gosh! (screams) O.K. well since I'm really mad I think I'm gonna go because I don't want to take all my anger out on you. Bye! (credits roll) (sings ditty) Kevin is fat. He abuses cats. He kisses dolls. He also plays with train cars. Loser!